i am the grinch

this is turning out to be the crappiest christmas ever. i fucking hate this arbitrary holiday and the fact that i am forced to participate in it. this fucking sucks.

sleepytime musings

I have developed a paranoia that my bed will collapse onto me while I sleep. However, I am too lazy/tired to do anything about it right now. It might be the turkey talking. But if the top bunk kills me in my sleep, for the record, I totally saw it coming. Damn ikea bed.

happy birthday Tom!

today is Tom Waits' 59th birthday! Happy birthday Tom, heres to hoping you still dont wanna grow up! thanks for the wonderful music!

tonight i'll be sipping some whiskey, listening to Toms 45s and remembering columbus.
hopefully i'll run into the Gin Soaked Boy.

TO: past me FROM: future me

do not be afraid. do not fear the influence of the actions of others on YOUR LIFE. do what you know is *right* and be *strong* because none of this can take your will if you don't allow it. think to the future. *don't behave like a fucking asshole*. if you are about to do something you think twice about, Ask yourself: "would a fucking asshole do that?" and if the answer is yes, DON'T DO IT. if you wouldn't do it in person, or on video, in front of your mother, DON'T DO IT. do not be afraid to Voice Your Opinion, it is the strongest weapon you have. SPEAK for yourself and do not let anyone or anything intimidate you into silence. but also know when to keep your mouth shut. question authority. question dogma. question motive. use critical thinking. study programming when you first want to, and don't let anyone talk you out of it. value the ones that love you for who you are and not what you can give. be firm and impassive. do not fear winter. Subaru's are not coming to get you. teach, but do not study to teach. do not take that "year off", it is the beginning of a "career off". do not live with someone you hardly know. do not shelter riffraff. learn binary. do not ignore your problems. do not go to that park with that boy. do not speak to the uniformed man. do not fear. do not compromise yourself for another. do not let yourself believe that anthers disregard makes you unworthy of respect. work hard, and you will appreciate what you have. work harder, and you might deserve it. don't work too hard for someone who profits off your labors, especially if they do not appreciate the fact that their income is thanks to you. do not look back with regret, only lessons learned.

winter is here

today i woke up to snow. i am normally not a big fan of snow, especially now that i am deep in dirty suburbia, but there is just something so enticing about the first flurries that finds me watching at the window for endless stretches of time. the light and airy, delicate flakes fluttering about, it makes me want to be wrapped in a thick comforter sipping clam chowder. i should stock up soon, it feels like a very cold winter this year. maybe this year i will try to make clam chowder from scratch.

as it gets colder and colder, so do i. i hate the bone-deep chilly feeling i have all winter, even central heating is not robust enough to keep me comfy. its always been so, i must be exceptionally hot-blooded. the doctors have always said so anyway. in winter i feel like i am walking around with a fever constantly, a 4 month fever. my poor feetsies.

the lovely snow blues are creeping up on me again. i can feel the days getting shorter with each moon pass. soon i'll be in full blown hibernation mode and crabby as hell. the little things are starting to get to me as they tend to do when the warmth leaves the sunlight. i get morose and melancholy. i turn into a sleepy mama-bear. its strange, i feel torn between the compulsion to want to be alone and curl up in a den somewhere, and the strong desire to fold myself into the warmth of another. the battle rages on. hopefully my hunny will catch on soon that i need his snuggles more than ever right now, but i doubt it. it would do no good to come right out and say so. his life is so full of busy and important things that he doesnt notice those little bits of me looking sideways at him at odd moments anymore. i don't so much mind, i know he has a hustling bustling life full of interesting folks and captivating activities, but sometimes i miss the way it was. i hope he finds his way back to my heart soon. i long for those close moments, early morning snug in bed with frost on the windows, and secret kisses on sleepy lashes. i dont think it will ever be that way again, and i have come to terms with it, i have accepted it, it is... "O.K.", but i still think about those days. now it has turned into something different and new-ish. a sort of plateau. we have both settled into our separate roles, and now that he lives farther away, those roles have become even more distinct. i guess this is what it feels like to "grow up". thats what my mother would tell me, i think. i have tried different things lately, in silly attempts to recapture his attention, but we are where we are. i feel like for him, it is more of a comforting convenience state, a dependable familiarity. for me, i don't really know what it is., except that i want our love to grow and not wallow. transformation i could handle, loss i could overcome, but stagnation is a misery i cannot take. it is a long suffering death. but the more attempts i make unnoticed, the less i want to try, and resign myself to a lifetime of quite moments waiting at the window. i feel like a victorian widow. who knows what the new year will bring? certainly, more snow.

have been crafting of late. knitting, sewing, baking, and more. i made a giant foldy-pen to let the ratties run wild in. its really fun to just hang out in there with them climbing all over me. they seem to enjoy it quite a bit. albus has a bump under her arm that worries me, so we will be going to the vet soon again, and i will bring edward for good measure since she is also at that scary age of blossoming tumors. expecting surgery soonish. i hope my sweet girls will be ok.

frosty is in the delights of new company. i really want this to work out for him. he deserves someone to treat him right, and lord knows he has had his fair share of waiting. i think we are all trying not to count chickens on this one, but i have very high hopes, and so far have not been disappointed. his new found affection is going through some hard times right now yet is still unfailingly wonderful. i wish there was some way we could be more supportive of his situation, but at the moment it seems he just needs time and space to process everything, which i respect.

ah, winter. you are the unrequited suitor, every year spurned, never fail to return. someday i hope to greet your approach with an open heart and a warm hearth, but until then... hold off on the snow until you are serious.

strange ebay journeys

in continuing my ebay travels, i have bore witness to many strange things for sale on the interwebs. here are some examples that amused me:



a host of, apparently, "rare" used beverage containers from thailand:
http://cgi.ebay.com/RARE-EMPTY-THAI-ENERGY-DRINK-KRA-TING-DANG-CAN-TIN_W0QQitemZ220313664424QQcmdZViewItemQQptZLH_DefaultDomain_0?hash=item220313664424&_trksid=p3286.c0.m14&_trkparms=66%3A2%7C65%3A15%7C39%3A1%7C240%3A1318

http://cgi.ebay.com/RARE-EMPTY-THAI-BOTTLE-MILK-Free-Ship_W0QQitemZ220313664462QQcmdZViewItemQQptZLH_DefaultDomain_0?hash=item220313664462&_trksid=p3286.c0.m14&_trkparms=66%3A2%7C65%3A15%7C39%3A1%7C240%3A1318

http://cgi.ebay.com/RARE-USED-EMPTY-THAI-WATER-PAPER-CUP-Free-Ship-NR_W0QQitemZ320318771651QQcmdZViewItemQQptZLH_DefaultDomain_0?hash=item320318771651&_trksid=p3286.c0.m14&_trkparms=66%3A2%7C65%3A15%7C39%3A1%7C240%3A1318

http://cgi.ebay.com/USED-EMPTY-THAI-BOTTLE-WATER-2-LITRES-Free-Ship_W0QQitemZ320318771306QQcmdZViewItemQQptZLH_DefaultDomain_0?hash=item320318771306&_trksid=p3286.c0.m14&_trkparms=66%3A2%7C65%3A15%7C39%3A1%7C240%3A1318



Sweet & Hot Teenage Asian LLLOOOVVVEEE


jokes for donations (proceeds go to local animal shelters)


somebodys moustache

a LUCKY marble!

a hobo's antique whiskey bottle, dreams inside
i actually found a really cool blog from this. check it out:
I AM NOT AFRAID OF WINTER


an ALMOND OF LOVE (this is actually pretty common, i find these all the time)

your very own song, custom made to your specifications


a steaming pile of revenge


haunted spirit ring! hopefully payable by a course in web design


an answer


this mans life ... dont know about this one...


stephans soul

apparently you CAN buy friends


your story!

ghost dog

sagebrush

facebook friend

four leaf clovers!

florida in a tube

dead frog

california dirt

a casket key (for all the necros out there)

a serenade

a pothole

winter is here

no!
i hate it when this time of year rolls around. its too crisp and cold for my liking in suburbia. it might be different if i had forest to stroll in, but here its just nasty and cold. bleh. i had better step up my knitting projects.

i got a whole slew of craft supplies to keep me busy for a while. i got a sewing machine! w00t! i sewed the ratties a sweet honeycomb hammock out of fluffy bright green and purplr fleece, and they love snuggling in it. i also made a tunnle, but they havent really seemed interested much so far.

got all the food ready for turkey day and i am rarin to go there. black friday is gonna suck though, ill be working from 9am to midnight and then going straight to VA to see family. but ill have the weeked off, and tons of good food, so im sure i wont be in too terrible of a mood.

hate the weather, love the holidays.

IDEA

PROPOSED FINANCIALLY BENEFICIAL / AMUSING ACTIVITY:

ALTERNATIVE HALLOWEEN COSTUMES FOR SALE


for example:

-a door. maybe there is something interesting inside? maybe not?
-orange jews
-chick magnet
-chairman moo
-an elbow/big toe/belly button or other random non-genital body part. or be genitals, whatever floats your boat.
-native tongue (this could have several designs, ranging from silly to morbid)
-whorled peas (we have all seen the bumper stickers)
-a horses ass
-top hat
-flenser (LOL)
-randomly generated sidekick
-the palin baby name generator

more/concept images to be posted!

election results live!

Sqd costume

here is my halloween costume. its a squid hoodie that frosty made me for my birthday. yay! its a pretty crappy picture taken from my camera phone, so you cant really make out the tentacles too well. use your imagination.

stuffy stuff

things have been crazy lately. helping the boyfriend move and settle into his new place. getting used to the new routine. new critters that i will have to write about. cooking experiments. reading new and interesting things. meeting new folks. work, work, work and soon, more WORK.

sheesh.

i've been looking at a lot of crafting sites/blogs and dang, it makes me want to create stuff. somehow i got into the habit of never having time to make neat things anymore, and i hate it. i need to start forcing myself to take time for creativity. i need a tangible outlet for all these ideas, concepts, and spontaneous brain explosions. i need to start knitting again, more. i have got a huge box of wonderful yarns calling me forlornly from my craft shelf that i have been blocking out for too long. i'm going to try to make at least 5 things this month. its about time for my annual matching hat/scarf frenzy, and i want to experiment with mittens this year. i wish i had a person to help me learn this crap, there is too much lost in translation from written instructions, and it gets overwhelmingly complicated real fast. i need to make a few cat-hats to warm up my knitting memories. i need to get ahold of some needles.


i also have been missing painting, so i think i will devote some time to that soon. i've been mulling around some ideas for turning one of my paintings into a series. maybe i'll work on that this week.

i've been doing cooking experiments, which have been very satisfying. last week, i made a super romantic fantastic dinner for the boyfriend (aka: MDM) consisting of delicious spice-crusted swordfish steaks, roasted/grilled vegetables, and delicious shells in a creamy herbed-mushroom sauce. (fresh shiitakes! yum!) we ate it with some delicious wine, and it was a great evening.
i made enough for leftovers, wonderful with Spanish rice.

a few weeks prior, i made a big crab feast at his new place. crab cakes, hot crab dip, fry chips, fresh baked bread, a yummy feast!

i made some pumpkin rolls which turned out delicious, so next i will be playing around with variations of this with other squash/carrots/different spices, etc.

i found a mouth waveringly enticing recipe for chocolate chocolate chip banana bread, which i will try. i might make another batch using dark chocolate and nuts as well. i cant wait!


we have new critters at the zooquarium!
a new rattie girl, names princess buttercup, that we rescued from petsmart. she had been alone there for far too long, and i am glad we grabbed her, because she is just the sweetest thing ever. so cuddly! my only regret is not bringing her home sooner! now we have 6, and the cage is looking a bit not-big-enough-for-my-tastes. we may be rigging up a new cage and tunnel system soon to give them more leg room. its fine as it is now, the cage we have now is plenty huge, but i am of the "too much room is preferable to simply sufficient" philosophy.

we also have a new turtle! her name is Lois, and she is technically a tortoise, being a box turtle. we were given her by a coworker who saved her from her dog, and her kids wanted to keep her as a pet. after about a week she decided she couldn't handle her properly and gave her to us, knowing we are turtle lovers and would take good care of her. we made her a BIG pen and she seems to be quite happy there.


whew, that was a lot of typing. i have a horrendous cut on my thumb and it hurts so im done writing for now.

squiddy stuff

found this great artist, Lana Crooks. she does fabric art and uses lots and lots of tentacles! her stuff looks great. i wish i was in the area so i could go to her exhibit.

cookin up a storm!

so this payday i went on a huge grocery binge and got soooo many good things to eat. last night i was in a cooking frenzy! i grilled/broiled up some salmon steaks and big fat shrimps with some yummy fresh veggies. i found that we apparently have a wok, and a pretty nice one, so i used it to grill/stir fry some asparagus, white button and shiitake mushrooms, and big chunks of green and red bell peppers. they came out sooo nicely, with the perfect crisp and a nice bit of carmelization on the outside, just the way i like it. add a bit of spanish rice and this is the best lunch I've had in a good while.

then i made some pumpkin rolls! they are so yummy, and now i have a few ideas for variations i want to try. i may even make them tomorrow in the wee hours. for now, here is my recipe for delicious pumpkin rolls:

i adapted this from the libbys recipe.

the cakey part:

1/4 cup powdered sugar (to sprinkle on towel)
1 1/2 cup all-purpose flour
1 teaspoon baking powder
1 teaspoon baking soda
1 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1 teaspoon ground cloves
1/2 teaspoon salt
6 large eggs
2 cup granulated sugar
1 1/3 cup pumpkin (i used pumpkin pie mix this time, because i like it spicy and that's what we had. next time i will be using pure, unadulterated, roasted fresh pumpkin.)



creamy filling:

2 pkg. (8 oz.) cream cheese, at room temperature
2 cup powdered sugar, sifted (i only had one cup, so i added a 1/2 c of regular sugar and it came out fine.)
12 tablespoons butter or margarine, softened
2 teaspoon vanilla extract
Powdered sugar (optional for decoration)

you mix the dry ingredients (all except the sugar) together and set aside.
then you mix all the wets and the sugar into a big frothy soup, and fold in the dry mix. mix it up until its like pancake batter. spread into a large rectangular pan, mine were about 13-15 inches and i got 3 rolls. bake at 375 and start checking it at about 10 or 11 minutes. you want it to be done but not get too dry on the edges. it should be springy and spongy.

let it cool. while its cooling mix up the creamy delicious filling part. you might want a bit extra because you will be stealing bits from the bowl.

you will want to lay down some waxed paper or a sugared towel for this part. put the cakey thing on it.
when its all mixed up take the frosting and spread it onto the cakey thing. then you can use the towel to roll it up into a log. its like cinnamon rolls. now when you slice it it will be all pretty and spiraled inside.

now you are free to wrap it in plastic wrap and stick it in the fridge. i made 3 from this recipe. one i started eating immediately, but they are better when they are chilled and have a chance to set. i brought one to work for everyone to sample. (its gone now) and i froze one for later. now i have a ready made pot luck item! w00t! (or next week when i have midnight munchies )

next try i will experiment with a few ingredients. this time i didn't have cloves so i used nutmeg, which turned out quite yummy, and i added a dash of almond extract. i also like to add chopped nuts inside on top of the frosting before i roll it up. texture is good. i think i might make a roll using some carrot cake type ingredients, and one using some squash. i have high hopes for this.

Adventures in Ebay

i have become quite the traveller in this epic land of late. i have been working lots of long overtime hours at work, about half of which are consumed by perusing random ebay items. i bought a ton of stuff last week, and now the packages are steadily rolling in. its like christmas!

so far i have received:

Typing Gloves- it gets really cold in my office, and i have poor circulation. my hands are constantly frozen so i got these great gloves from LuxuryDivas to keep them warm while typing.

a Squid Girl comic- i know nothing about this comic, but i couldn't resist! bought fromGuffeyGirl152

a REALLY AWESOME BOB DYLAN CD- a promo copy of his carnegie 63 show. got it from TheFink69 , who is incidentally, a really cool dude.


2 Tom Waits albums- i got Alice and Real Gone, both special editions and in sealed, mint condition. since i already have these tracks in digital form, i just have to try not to open these for a few decades. unless i decide to buy listening copies... bought from Jahshalala and very well shipped.

Abbey Road in Goooold- because i am a super Beatles dork. and this is a wonderful album. and everybody needs a little bling bling, yanno? got from Jho72con gifts and collectables.


Tom Waits, The Heart Of Saturday Night- from JrMozart . i love this album. it was the first of Tom's records i ever purchased, years ago, which i stupidly gave to a romantic interest who was also a fan. this is a (much better condition) replacement. this came in a huge box filled with solid foam! the record is in GREAT condition! i cant wait to give it a listen!


Magical Mystery Tour Memories- a rockumentary about the making of Magical Mystery Tour. I'm gonna watch it when i get home! thanks numbersee at SmallPriceBigStore!


and my most exciting item yet, a UKULELE!!! - its a Hohner HU212* and it is in excellent condition, from sstoys2. i tuned it up and learned to play a G major chord! w00h00! i will love jamming out on this baby. yay!

its water, i swear

i assure you, my friends
that spot on my pants is not pee.
i was overtaken by too much vigor
while washing my hands, you see.

Squiddy's Kitchen Creations: Cooking With My MAMA!!!

the latest and long-awaited installment in Squiddy's Kitchen Creations is COOKING WITH MY MAMA! i love my mama, she taught me mostly everything i know about cooking, and fostered a natural love of yummy things and making yummy things from the time i was a baby. i don't get to see her nearly as much as i want to these days, so when i had the opportunity to spend a weekend with her, i jumped at the chance. we would be house-sitting for my aunt and uncle, who are also very cool, and would have all the yummy materials we would need to cook up a storm. yay!

so Friday, i arrived ready to make... PIZZA!

i brought my bread machine to mix up the dough while we played guitar hero.
when it was done, we started working on the toppings! This is a slightly-fuzzy shot of my beautiful MAMA and my most excellent roomie, FrostyPants.

mmm...

there are few things so sweet as a pan of sizzling bacon!

Frosty is spreading sauce on his crust. his is better looking than mine.

then, we chopped up the peppers: the mushrooms, and the tomatoes.
here is my mama makin bacon! isn't she lovely?
and here is Frosty spreading again. he likes the sauce. heh.

MMMMMmmm... there are few things as sweet as a pan of sizzling bacon!

for my pizza, i chose baby bella mushrooms, bleu cheese, tomatoes, bacon, olives, and a bit of fresh basil and green pepper, all on a hearty homestyle sauce.

then i added Mozzi and some Olives. Yum!

and then... BACON! and it is ready!

here is Frosty's pie, pre mozzy:

not sure how i missed getting more shots of his, take my word that it was beautiful and delicious.
here is mine, a bit over cooked, but still yummy. i couldnt wait to eat it and thus:

and here is frostys perfect bubbly pizza, not overcooked:
Verdict: Guilty! (of being scrumptious!)

***

the next morning, mama and i decided to make a big breakfast fry-up!

we started with excellent cappuccinos from my aunts AMAZING wonder-filled caffeine dispensary:i have never tasted such magnificence in home coffee. ill bet that machine costs more than a car!

first: taters

next: onions and mushrooms. not pictured: green peppers. home fries are yummy!
those are hard-working hands.




two of my favorite veggies!



now for my favorite part. this is a great brekkie item that Frosty taught me. its fun to make, and yummy too! i call it Birds Nest / Eggs In A Basket.


first you need a nice hot fry pan:some BUTTER: (because if you use margarine or some other such abomination, you clearly have NO SOUL. don't even say PAM in my presence. Bacon Fat, however, is perfectly acceptable.now get the pan nice and sizzly with a good butter coating. don't burn it, baby, sizzle it.
now check on those taters, sizzling away. mmm, yeah! even the cheddarwurst is trying to sneak in there! you wait your turn, you naughty sausages.
time for the onions to go in. if you put them in before the potatoes have fried a bit, they get too crispy. and by crispy, i mean burned to charcoal.
now slap some bread on that sizzly pan that's been waiting.
and make a cookie-cutter type circle in it, like so. i usually use a small-mouthed glass, but you can use a cookie cutter/shot glass/jar or whatever. you want the hole to be about 2.5 inches or so, enough to hold the egg and still keep the structural integrity of the bread intact. press it down, and the pan will toast the bread under the rim making it easier to pull out.
now you have your nest. now put the egg in before the bread gets TOO toasty, or it ll burn.

i like to let it cook for about 10-15 seconds and then scoot it around a bit so it doesn't stick.i like to add some veggies in there so i can eat them while i cook. I'm a piggy like that. now you can see a good solid egg white on the bottom, so its time to flip. carefully!

ah, i was distracted at some point or maybe the heat was a bit high. the edges shouldn't look quite this dark. it ll still taste good though!
meanwhile, the home fries are still sizzling away. normally, you would make the eggs after the fries are done, but i got excited, so sue me.
this is what the finished product looks like:

hopefully yours will be a bit less burnt, and have a nice, thick-gooey yolk center. yum!


now for the sausages! i really have a strange aversion to most ground meat items, but my one exception is cheddarwurst. god i love that stuff.


slap em in the pan,

and roll em around until they re nice and sizzly, and the skins start to split a bit. covering them is a good idea. i also like to add a dash of water to the pan really quick before the lid goes on, to make it nice and steamy in there. it helps the process.
perfect!


fries are done! take them out and plate them!

excellent! everything smells so good! even winnie wants to get in on this.

muaha! too bad you have no opposable thumbs! more for me!

i have no pictures of the final spread because, well, i ate it all before i remembered to photograph it. but it was GOOD!

i cant wait to cook with my mama again!